10 Things You Probably Don't Know About Me...

If you ever meet me in person, you'd probably notice that I'm a bit quirky.  (Aren't we all though?)  Sometimes in conversations with people when I bring up something about myself, I get a weird look and a "Really?".  In an attempt for you to get to know me better, I thought I'd share some things with you that you probably don't know about me.  Don't you feel special?  You should.

1.  I don't like to run.  Yes, I am a runner.  But that doesn't mean that I like it.  Would I rather do something less strenuous?  Sure!  I run because I can.  And when I run I thank God that I am healthy enough to run.  Running keeps me amazed at my body.  It's not perfect by any means, but it's strong and I like the feeling of accomplishment after my run is over.

2.  I grind my own flour.  Now, if you'd been to my house, I am sure you have probably noticed the big red flour mill in my kitchen and already know this fact about moi.  Feel free to skip to #3.  I won't be a hater.  About 3 years ago I started learning about how nutritionally void white flour is and how your body essentially treats it as sugar and decided to grind my own whole wheat flour.  I really like it and my family and I have transitioned well.  Now, don't get me wrong, once in a while when I'm in a pinch I buy a bag of white flour, but I use it sparingly.  And feel horribly guilty about it.  No lie.

3.  I also don't use white sugar.  I use sucanat in place of brown sugar and evaporated cane juice in place of white sugar.  Does that mean I would turn down a piece of cheesecake because it has white sugar in it?  Heck no!  But I choose not to cook with it.  

4.  I am very intrigued with the idea of raw food diets or Paleo diets.  I'm just a bit too scared to make the change for fear I might diet of starvation or something.  Mainly because I don't like veggies all that much, so I wouldn't eat, and then I would starve.  I would love to just go Paleo 100% for a month or so (ok, maybe a week) and see what effects I see/feel.  I bet I would be amazed...but until I overcome my fear, I will just envy people who have.

5.  I am blind.  Not really, but if someone stole my glasses and contacts from me, I would freak because I would not be able to see anything and have an extreme panic attack.  Don't get any ideas...

6.  I am a bit of a control freak.  I am slowly recognizing this and its effect on people around me, so I am trying to work on it.  And because of my control issue, I let fear of the unknown/new things get the best of me...and in turn I miss out on some of the best experiences of my life.  I'm a work in progress!

7.  I LOVE LOVE LOVE the idea of being self-sufficient.  I LOVE growing my own food in my garden and berry patches.  I LOVE collecting eggs from the chicken coop. I LOVE baking my own bread...and having it taste awesome.   In an ideal world, I would live on 100+ acres, grow/raise all of my own food, and build a house with my bare hands (ok, with my hubby's bare hands).  Oh yeah, and have solar panels and a wood cook stove and a windmill.  I long for a simpler life instead of the hustle and bustle work I currently live in.

8.  I sometimes regret getting a tubal after my youngest was born.  At the time it seemed like a great idea (pregnancy and me don't really get along and I'm miserable by the time that 40th week comes along), but I now think it would have been awesome to have a houseful of kids.  I think it's because my kids fight so much and families with lots of children seem to have better relationships with their siblings.  I just think big families are so cool!  

9.  I struggle with insecurity BIG TIME in most every area of my life.  I constantly battle feelings of not feeling good enough, being good enough, looking good enough.  I know that I should be grounded in what God thinks of me and I am trying to renew my mind in that way, but I still struggle.

10.  I long for real friends.  Friends who are willing to risk being authentic with me.  Friends who are willing to give me hard core advice that sometimes hurts.  Friends who will pray for me.  Friends who will encourage me. I do have a few, but many times I have had friends who I am authentic with, but they didn't return the favor.  And that hurts.  If you can't be real with me, then we aren't true friends.  Amen.