Love & Respect In The Family By Dr. Emerson Eggerichs

I was part way through reading Dr. Eggerich's book Love & Respect when I saw that Love & Respect in the Family was available at Booksneeze for review.  Because I was really enjoying reading Love & Respect, and I was feeling as if my home life was a bit out of control with kids who were disrespectful...and with parents who felt both helpless and clueless about how to intercede, I chose to review Love & Respect In The Family.  I am really glad I did!  This book is written in way that encourages parents to not lose hope.  But also to not blame their children for the situation they are in.  Change starts with us as parents.  There is a crazy cycle that happens when parents feel disrespected and kids feel unloved.  When parents feel disrespected they tend to act in ways that appears unloving to their children.  When children feel unloved they tend to act in ways that appears disrespectful.  And the cycle goes on and on until someone chooses to break the cycle.  We can break this cycle and transform it into an Energizing Cycle where as we show our kids love they will naturally want to show us respect.  Through this cycle, parent-child relationships are strengthened.

Dr. Eggerichs shares with us his wisdom gained through parenting his own children, who are now grown, as well as years of experience as a pastor and helping families.  His children actually share how the ways he and their mother had parented had helped and hurt them emotionally.  Dr. Eggerichs encourages parents to not give up, but to look to God for help in those tumultuous times where we feel helpless.  He has developed an acrostic GUIDES for parents to use when interacting with their children.  He shows us how to Give, Understand, Instruct, Discipline, Encourage and Supplicate in order to develop loving habits that will cultivate strong relationships with our children. 

One aspect of the book that is extremely helpful for readers is located at the end of each chapter.  The author makes reference to a particular area of THEIR WEBSITE where the readers can go if they need additional information pertaining to topics in that particular chapter. 

I really think every parent should read this book and would greatly benefit from it.  I am encouraged and excited to put this knowledge into practice in my own parenting and see the results!

*I received a complimentary copy of this book from the publisher via Booksneeze.com in exchange for this honest review.

No-Spend January: Meal Planning

How is your January going so far?  We are only 6 days into it but I feel inspired and motivated to reach my goals! As you know I have set a goal to set up a budget and stick to it this year.  I am happy to report that I have the budget pretty much set up, although I am sure it will need some tweaking from time to time.  I would love to use an online budgeting software such as Mint or Mvelopes and I have messed around with both of them but still haven't determined if I like using them or not.  For right now I am using a basic 6 column accounting ledger book.  I want whatever system I use to be simple and easy to maintain or I won't stick with it. 

After our shopping craze through the holidays with gift-buying and budget-blowing, I always like to declare this month No-Spend January.  A month where you get back on track with your spending and stay within budget by not buying any unnecessary things.  For me that means making a meal plan for the week and using that plan to make a grocery shopping list.  This also means I go through my pantry BEFORE shopping and see what ingredients I have on hand so I don't spend money on things I already have (which I am notorious for doing!). 

This also means that I plan my meals around those items I already have too.  For example, I would love to make a yummy chicken dish, but my freezer is full of beef and pork...so I eat beef and pork instead of buying chicken right now...unless of course the chicken is on sale.  I am also keeping an eye on the store ads to look for those deals that are rock-bottom prices that I should stock up on.  For example, if peanut butter is $1.99 a jar and that is the lowest price I have seen it at, I will stock up on them and buy as many as I think we will use until it's on sale again. (I think most stores rotate sales every 13 weeks, but not entirely sure).  By doing this, you are always using peanut butter that is a rock-bottom price instead of buying one or two jars, running out, and then having to buy the remaining 8 jars you will need at a much higher price.  Sure, it takes a bit out of your budget to stock up on items like these but it eventually evens itself out a bit as you build a bit of a stockpile.  If you find deals like these, you will then adjust your shopping list and meal plan accordingly.  If you are like me, you have tons of meals in your freezer and pantry already...you just have to look for them.  Do you have a couple cans of soup?  Then mark a meal off your list that requires that you buy items for and make soup instead.  It will simplify your meals and free up a bit of money so that you can stock up on the deals at the store without going over budget. 

I did this just last week.  I buy coconut oil from a local Amish family who sells grains, and natural items out of their basement as a make-shift store.  This family had informed me that they were moving out of state in the spring and were closing down their business on December 31st.  So I paid her a visit on Dec 31st (nothing like waiting until the last possible minute!) and bought over $100 of coconut oil and a few other items.  Her prices are cheaper than I have found anywhere and were actually much lower than normal due to the wholesale price dropping.  I bought a 50 lb bucket of coconut oil that is normally over $100 in her store for $78.00!  And honestly, it will probably last me all year...or close to it.  I use coconut oil for all of my oil needs with the exception of olive oil once in a while, so this is something that I know I will use....and it won't go back or expire sitting in my pantry.  There is another local Amish store who is going to start selling it, however I know their price will be much higher than what I paid.  So I stocked up on oil and just adjusted my meals and shopping list to allow for the oil purchase.  And guess what?!  I have stayed on budget! 

The last time I did No-Spend January, our water well pump died and had to be replaced...for $2200!  I hope and pray we don't have any big things like that happen and I am able to stick to it!

If you are interested in doing No-Spend January in your home, check out THIS BLOG.  She is doing what she calls a January Money Diet and gives you practical ideas of how to stay on track each day!

Getting a Jump Start on The New Year

Well it's that time again!  Time to get focused and write down those thing I would like to accomplish in this new year.  I know it's not the new year yet, but New Year's Day falls on a Wednesday and I like things to start new things on Mondays...so I am posting my list (and starting) today!  I also realized that last year I didn't remember some of my goals because I didn't look at the list regularly so this year I plan to print out my list and post it where I can see it. 

 

So here they are...

 

PHYSICALLY

I am ready to do this once and for all.  We are going on vacation to the beach in June and I want to reach goal weight by then.  I am currently at 168.8 lbs and I want to see 150 by mid-June.  That's just under 1 lb a week that I need to lose which is totally achievable. 

SPIRITUALLY

I really want to grow in my spiritual walk this year.  I have signed up to be in a year-long women's small group which will require a new level of commitment and consistency and I a excited about it!

ATHLETICALLY

I don't have any racing goals this year and in fact may not race at all.  My goal is to become more toned and fit during my weight loss so I won't feel hindered to try new things because of my lack of physical fitness.

FINANCIALLY

I want to get back on track with Dave Ramsey's Baby Steps.  This means paying off our van as soon as possible and then start putting money into savings.  First and foremost I want to set up a workable budget that our entire family adheres to.

MARRIAGE

Continue to see our marriage grow by nurturing it through date nights, open communication, and showing each other mutual love and respect. 

PARENTING

Try to listen more to my children instead of instructing or correcting them.  I want to see the heart of my children.  I also want to show them unconditional love.

 

FAMILY

Goal #1:  Spend more quality time as a family doing things other than watching TV!  Plan to do 1 fun thing per month as a family.

Goal #2:  Once our budget is in place, I would like to figure out some system of chores and allowances.

Goal #3:  Develop authentic & quality relationships with extended family scheduling regular visits with them.

Goal #4:  Start teaching my kids stories from the Bible by doing some reading in the evenings.

 

HOMEMAKING

Goal #1: Make a weekly & monthly cleaning schedule and try my best to maintain order in our home so it can be a place of relaxation.

Goal #2:  Continue with last year's goal to organize every room in our house and purging those things we do not use/need.

Goal #3:  Do weekly meal planning and grocery list in order to save money on food and also use items from our pantry.